I’ve been somewhat slack at blogging over the last week. The sun has taken a wrong turn somewhere in the world and ended up shining gloriously over the UK. Presumably being male, it hasn’t stopped to ask for directions. Whilst its stuck here, and before it finally gives in to Mrs. Suns nagging to ask for directions out of here, I have been shoving Baby Z outside constantly to soak up some Vitamin D. Complete with sun block of course. He’s been going positively mental with happiness running around. Although he doesn’t like the touch of grass on his hands. Once he tumbles onto it he can take a good few minutes to stand back up again as he outright refuses to use his hands to aid him. Imagine a baby mime artist trying to get up whilst pushing against imaginary glass. That’s him!
Anyhoo. What I meant to say was, before the sun came out I was going to blog about my cousins wedding. Last month I was at a cousins wedding and I learnt how to go to a wedding with a toddler. Most of my dresses still have the scars to show for it. Last week it was a close family wedding and this time I was going to be prepared. Oh yes I was. I was determined to yummy mummy my self through an entire week of weddingness.
It sort of worked. I emerged after a week of partying with only one destroyed dress, my nerves only slightly frayed and a Baby Z who, lucky for me, wanted his Daddy to carry him around for most of the week. Hooooray!
Which meant that, this time, I actually remember bits from the actual wedding itself. Like every wedding, there was the good, the bad and the jaw dropping just bizarre. Like…
The bit where you see your cousin for the first time as a bride and want to burst into tears. Partly because you can now turn on the waterworks at the click of your fingers at anything. And partly because you can’t believe the girl that feels like your baby sister is getting married.
The bit where the groom gets muddled during the civil ceremony about whether there’s one ring or two, declaring there’s definitely only one. Cue, the ring bearer freezing mid standing up and holding the extra ring up nervously. Everything then clicking into place and the ceremony proceeding as normal. Us, desperately wanting to shout “Surpriiiise!” from the back. I don’t blame him being muddled. She looked stunning!
Baby Z entertaining himself with the switch of a lamp during the entire ceremony. Thankfully everyone ignored what looked like weird morse code from one corner of the room.
The mystery man who did an entire rendition of Michael Jackson’s Bad during one of the dance parties. Complete with “jeans grabbing”, spinning, pointing; you get the drift. No-one seemed to know who he was but it was evident neither the bride nor the grooms side knew him. Some people just watched slightly stunned. Others wondered whether they should tap him on the shoulder mid dance and ask who the hell he was. Someone suggested maybe he was just a mystery dancer that went from party to party to do his moves.
Finding out at the end he was a plus one. He was greeted with whoops on every day after this. I think he was quite pleased.
Wanting to deck the bossy woman that was trying to usher my cousin out at lightning speed at the end of the wedding because the venue needed clearing by a certain time. It meant she didn’t get to say her goodbyes to a lot of people. (Obviously I would never deck her in real life. I did do a good job in my head though). As fate would have it, my cousin decided to go down to the ground floor in the lift seeing as her dress probably weighed as much as her. We all got to say our byes to her properly before realising the lift was actually broken. In your face bossy woman!
Spending the entire wedding periodically saying “ahh they’re so young. Are we old?” Then getting excited when the tea and biscuits started getting rolled out.
Promising the frazzled looking OH that he could do whatever he wanted the following weekend as he tried to stop Baby Z from escaping for the zillionth time.
Hovering around the sweetie table like a child, eating one too many and then repeating “I feel a bit sick”, a lot. Spotting astrobelts and going back for more.
Realising we actually are getting older and can’t handle consecutive late nights anymore.
Hoping the next family wedding won’t be for at least 6 months.
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