Moving!

Hello All!!

This is a quick post to say I have FINALLY become a self hosted blog. After about 2 years of saying I’ll do it. Yes…because I am that lazy.

I will now be http://www.notmyyearoff.com – It actually looks a bit of a mess at the moment because in true me style I took the plunge instead of methodically getting all my stuff together first. So its missing my theme (mainly) and various other bits and pieces which I’m now searching my emails for. But its coming together and I’m hoping to cobble it all back together quickly over the next week. (How many Plug INs?!?)

If you follow me on here then you’ll have to re-subscribe. Its a small, big and very annoying thing where I can’t just shift my users across. If, like me, you are epically lazy then you will find, any time you try to access my old address it will divert over to my new (currently not that nice to look at) blog. (I’ll put the divert on tonight sometime!).

I have also mentally prepared myself to free fall a bazillion places in the Tots100.

BUT I am FINALLY Self hosted!

Hurrah!

Oh – and if you have me in your bookmarks and blog rolls, please could you update? Thank you!

Advertisement

2 Years

Almost 2 years ago I was very heavily pregnant and approaching my due date of the 16th December. It had snowed heavily and I was stuck indoors…bored! I didn’t mind too much though as it meant I could just sleep all day and at that stage in my pregnancy I was either completely tired all the time or wondering where my next lamb chop was going to come from. Even in the heavy snow. Lamp chops were my obsessive craving.

Thankfully this mental craving only lasted the duration of my pregnancy, after which I quickly went back to hating all fatty things and spending ages cutting it off any meat I touch.

Almost two years on I have a toddler that hates lamb. He doesn’t like the chewy texture and will chew for a while and then try to spit it back out again, much preferring chicken. Cottage Pie is a firm favourite though…on the days where he is in the mood to eat. One must be in the mood. And one mustn’t let food get in the way of playing.

Two years on we have a toddler that has changed our lives forever and continues to do so every day. The little whirlwind that doesn’t stop and who, over the last month, has taken to dancing to every tune that comes on TV. Not just bum wiggling but even groovy hand moves. Straight out of the 70’s. And everyone must join in!

Two years ago today I didn’t know whether we were having a boy or a girl. My instincts told me it was a boy but I couldn’t picture what he looked like. At this stage we hadn’t even chosen a name for him/her. We always meant to sit down and look through name books but I don’t remember touching a single one. We just rattled off names we liked and 100% were ruled out. It had to be right. We hadn’t found the right one. It took us until he was a day old to finally seriously start looking. In the end, naming him wasn’t that hard. And so he was named Little Z.

Two years ago I had no clue of even how to hold a baby. Before I had little Z I would only hold a newborn for about a minute if I was lucky before they started crying. I really only liked “solid” babies. You know, the one that could sit up and giggle. Then I could entertain for hours!

Two years ago I had no idea what it was like to have a baby in your life.

Two years on we have a little boy with his own personality. I can see my stubbornness in him. I slightly dread the teen years and hope he is a better teen than I was. I can see the OH’s slim build in him ( that will always be there no matter how many pizzas we try to feed him!) and a love of sport. I can picture us freezing at the side of the football pitch watching him run after the ball constantly. Even if he’s not meant to.

I remember when Little Z turned one and there was a big part of me that was very sad about it. He was growing up and it felt like those first months had gone by too quickly and that I’d never get them back. This last year has been SO much fun though. This last year was the year he grew into a little boy. The year he’s given us an insight into who he is as a little person and just that is a world of discovery in itself. Things he likes, things he doesn’t like, the things he says, the things he finds awesome and the way he makes the tiniest thing the centre of the universe for a while.

Dearest 23 Month Old

Hello Toddler…we’re going on holiday!! Oh yes, after almost 2 years we are braving it and going abroad. Some (a lot) of people are saying we’re crazy to be taking a toddler on a plane but I’m sure it’ll be fine. Millions of people do it every day, right? I’m sure it’ll be ..umm…we’ll see. I’m slightly concerned you hate sand though. A week on the beach. Hmmmm.

Anyhow, you said your first 3 word sentence this month, hurrah!! It was “Look At DAT!!!”… So so cute. You don’t actually say hundreds of words do I was getting a bit worried that you might be referred for speech therapy and planning on hiding under the window when they came round for your 2 year check so was pleasantly shocked when you said it. You also like asking “What da doing??!” very regularly. You tend to just babble through, unconcerned, through any words you don’t know and just gesture wildly. It’ll probably come in use on holiday in parts they don’t speak English.

You’ve also learned how to open the most difficult doors at your Aunts house. You’ve been opening every other door in your existence for a whole now but, one day recently when we came back from watching Skyfall, we were greeted with an almighty booming declaration of “HE OPENED OUR DOORS!!”. We stopped dead in our tracks, petrified at first…then registered what was bring said. It brought back a flash of Jurassic Park. You know, that scene where the dinosaurs learn to open the doors to the kitchen and people realise they are doomed. Doomed!! (Not that you are anything like a dinosaur, you understand? Although you do regularly mess all my pots and pans up! And last week you managed to flip the lid of the cooking oil and spill 2 litres all over the floor. Do you know how hard it was to clean that up? I was sliding around 2 days later despite having mopped it repeatedly).

You’re much more confident in yourself now and show a bit more determination if someone takes a toy from you. Our stance is still very much “share share” but that secret worrying part of me now worries a bit less about your self confidence. And maybe I won’t sign you up to karate classes just yet.

We are going to have to start organising your 2nd birthday party soon!! I’ve already seen the perfect cakes. (yep there’ll be two, again!), both are Sesane street related. Actually, I should probably order both today. And maybe the decorations…and maybe all the plates and stuff too. Argggh, let the party madness commence!

So until next time baby Toddler….mmmmmwah!

A Mother’s Prayer for Her Child By Tina Fey

I don’t usually repost posts – but I was stumbling around on Stumble Upon and discovered this.  Its so funny but so spot on…..enjoy!  Does this count as a Flashback Friday? 😉

(Thanks to Melody Godfred for letting me repost this.  Go check out her blog for some good read)…

“First, Lord: No tattoos. May neither Chinese symbol for truth nor Winnie-the-Pooh holding the FSU logo stain her tender haunches.

May she be Beautiful but not Damaged, for it’s the Damage that draws the creepy soccer coach’s eye, not the Beauty.

When the Crystal Meth is offered, may she remember the parents who cut her grapes in half And stick with Beer.

Guide her, protect her when crossing the street, stepping onto boats, swimming in the ocean, swimming in pools, walking near pools, standing on the subway platform, crossing 86th Street, stepping off of boats, using mall restrooms, getting on and off escalators, driving on country roads while arguing, leaning on large windows, walking in parking lots, riding Ferris wheels, roller-coasters, log flumes, or anything called “Hell Drop,” “Tower of Torture,” or “The Death Spiral Rock ‘N Zero G Roll featuring Aerosmith,” and standing on any kind of balcony ever, anywhere, at any age.

Lead her away from Acting but not all the way to Finance. Something where she can make her own hours but still feel intellectually fulfilled and get outside sometimes And not have to wear high heels. What would that be, Lord? Architecture? Midwifery? Golf course design? I’m asking You, because if I knew, I’d be doing it, Youdammit.

May she play the Drums to the fiery rhythm of her Own Heart with the sinewy strength of her Own Arms, so she need Not Lie With Drummers.

Grant her a Rough Patch from twelve to seventeen.Let her draw horses and be interested in Barbies for much too long, For childhood is short – a Tiger Flower blooming Magenta for one day – And adulthood is long and dry-humping in cars will wait.

O Lord, break the Internet forever, that she may be spared the misspelled invective of her peers And the online marketing campaign for Rape Hostel V: Girls Just Wanna Get Stabbed.

And when she one day turns on me and calls me a Bitch in front of Hollister, Give me the strength, Lord, to yank her directly into a cab in front of her friends, For I will not have that Shit. I will not have it.

And should she choose to be a Mother one day, be my eyes, Lord, that I may see her, lying on a blanket on the floor at 4:50 A.M., all-at-once exhausted, bored, and in love with the little creature whose poop is leaking up its back. “My mother did this for me once,”she will realize as she cleans feces off her baby’s neck. “My mother did this for me.” And the delayed gratitude will wash over her as it does each generation and she will make a Mental Note to call me. And she will forget. But I’ll know, because I peeped it with Your God eyes.

Amen.”

-Tina Fey

(That my friends, is what you call good writing. Click on the link and pick up Tina Fey’s book Bossypants for more.)

My 80s

My 80’s were most of my childhood…

A time when you could play out till it got dark, by yourself

Run around the streets without fear of being knocked down by a car

When you could buy 2 pints of milk, a loaf of bread and crisps for less then a pound

When you bought sweets in ounces and quarters

When your PE bag and trainers were Gola and that wasn’t cool

When you were scared of the Daleks

When you loved watching the Muppet show once a week on Sundays

When you had never heard of the Internet or mobile phones

And it didn’t matter

When you had one computer to share around the whole of your primary school

When you had a Hitachi TV with fake wood casing

and no remote control

When Blue Peter was fantastic

As was Rainbow and Lets Pretend, Puddle Lane and All sorts

When you knew what “magic magic E” meant

And you were cool.

Oh so cool.

Those were my Eighties.

Check out the other 80s entries in the The Gallery this week